Monday, 25 May 2015

Attitude is everything




Grab a coffee, tea or your favourite tipple – this is a long one…

Well, it wasn’t a great weekend for sport. Sheffield Eagles lost, the debacle of the grand prix, not to mention the catastrophic meltdown of Liverpool FC. However, if you look at the bright side:

  1. There were great performances from young players on both sides – Sheffield and London.
  2. Vettel and Ferrari gained second place – Forza Ferrari!!
  3. Liverpool FC have 11 weeks to turn it around (next year is our year, LOL).
You see, every cloud has a silver lining! Attitude is everything! In sport, as in life, you can wallow in self-pity and misery or you can rebuild and refuse to let anything defeat or deflate you. I was reminded of this when twittertroll raised her ugly head again. Shame because I thought she’d grown out of her childish behaviour. This time though I did find it amusing that she had exposed herself to everyone and I hope now that they know this was all orchestrated by her. Sorry love but you have not broken our spirit or prevented us from pursuing our dreams. What it has done is reinforced my drive to continue to build my business, my books and my PhD but most importantly of all, to continue my parenting. I lead by example. Attitude is everything!

I have always taught the boys to be independent, strong, respectful, humble and most of all honest – honest with themselves and with everyone around them. I admit, it is not the ‘norm’ and I wasn’t sure how it would be received by other people but I am so glad I have stuck to my guns and so far it has and is, paying off. With being honest with yourself, comes the acceptance that you will make mistakes. The boys have been taught that mistakes are OKAY. Human beings have the ability to make mistakes and learn from them – well, most do. Accepting mistakes, apologising and learning from them separates the decent ones from the … well… dishonest ones. 

The proudest moments as a Mum have been when the boys have held their hands up, admitted their mistakes, apologised and moved on. Attitude is everything!

In order to teach this rare honesty, as a parent I have had to be honest too. I have always admitted mistakes to the boys and apologised for them. If I have been wrong in an argument, I have admitted to them I was wrong. I don’t see this as a weakness at all. The boys know adults are not always right! It is about a mutual respect. Very few people understand the dynamics within my precious family and I have been questioned many times and told ‘they are only kids’ or ‘they have too much say’ and the best one of all ‘when they get to a teenager, they will rebel.’ Really? The truth is the boys are human beings. Just because they are children, does not make them inferior. They need guidance, discipline and to be taught how to conduct themselves. That is my job. It is not my job to treat them like second class citizens or bully them because I am bigger and older. Wes and I agreed this week we do not need to justify the dynamics within our family. We are all happy, all pursuing our dreams, all working incredibly hard and all being honest with each other and more importantly, ourselves. Attitude is everything!

Bright Blue Eyes

I am currently re-writing my website and re-launching my business. When I received my three book publishing deal, I put the business on hold. Admittedly with hindsight, I rushed into publishing my first book. As a single Mum, the financial pressure is always a tremendous weight on my shoulders. Sometimes decisions are made for the wrong reasons but with good intentions. We all live and learn.

Bright Blue Eyes offers business support services to organisations that do not have the staff to carry out administrative tasks. Services are offered on a one off basis or on an ongoing basis, dependent on the need of the client.



















 My website is under construction but can be viewed here.

Follow me too:

Writing

I’m taking a break from writing to try and build up the family coffers!! Basically, I’m skint and need to keep my little family afloat – I’m sure that is true for many of us these days. My ideal would be to earn money from writing and that is my long term goal but it doesn’t pay the bills NOW. Until that happens, I will be writing in my spare time!


These are the part time projects I am working on:

Beyond the Lies
I have taken so much time over the editing of this sequel because my confidence was dented with the publishing of my first book but I am confident this will be a great book when it is finished. Attitude is everything!

Behind the Painted Smile
I really love this book. I don’t like to start too many projects but this story gripped me from the first idea. I have written approximately 10,000 words and the ideas are flowing freely. This is about a woman who turns to social media for company as she gets little attention at home. Her obsession with it turns into sinister acts that results in murder!

Charity
This is in essence a story about how several peoples’ tragic lives intertwine to result in something very special. This idea has been so strong that already I have 15,000 words written.

I really wish I could clone myself!! Who said single Mums sit in their pyjamas watching TV all day!!  Every week I realise how hard I work – hopefully I will see the rewards soon!

PhD

I am finalising the revised proposal this week. Please keep your fingers crossed that I can secure funding. This would be my ultimate dream come true.

My debut novel is still available:


Have you had the chance to read it yet? Would you like to review it for me?

Read the first three chapters FREE on my website
Available from: Pegasus Publishers
Amazon UK
Kindle
Amazon US

 
Or you can order from your local bookshop. The ISBN number is : 978-1-84386-789-0

Finally, I want to say this to everyone. BE NICE. It doesn’t cost anything to be nice and supportive. Being truthful is not the same as being mean or badly behaved. The old saying, ‘it’s not what you say, it’s how you say it’ is so true. If a child is told they are no good and won’t make anything of themselves, it is likely to happen. It truly saddens me that some people, especially but not exclusively women, put other women down. I’m all for being supportive and growing together. I am not in competition with anyone. 

It’s half term this week so I can start work early with no interruption for school runs apart from Tuesday when Wes is going into school for revision – SCHOOL IN YOUR HOLIDAY TIME. That is dedication. ATTITUDE IS EVERYTHING.

Have a fabulous week and SUPPORT each other.






Monday, 18 May 2015

National Service is NOT required

National Service is not required to instill respect, honest and integrity in young people. Parents need to learn to TEACH their children from the moment they give birth. I blame the 1960s and the 'free spirit' attitude. All children are blank canvasses and bloody gorgeous ones at that. It is up to us as parents to turn them into works of art.

From the day I wanted to be a parent, I knew and understood it was MY responsibility to teach my children - not teachers, not society and certainly not the armed forces. It is a FULL TIME job - 24/7, 365 days per year.  It really saddens me to see children turning to crime and their parents defending their action as its not their fault for not being given the opportunities - NO! It's the parents fault for not creating the opportunities or teaching the children how to create their own opportunities. As a child I didn't get life. I was naive and believed everything people told me. I believed I was no good, wouldn't possibly be able to progress to where I wanted to go. What did I do? Believed them. Now I see it differently and I have made damn sure my boys are not dissuaded from pursuing their dreams.

What can I say? Lucas has declared he wants to be Prime Minister. Well, after he made sure someone else would be doing all the paperwork! Eight years old and he is already a political analyst. Mums and animals will be treated like royalty - GUARANTEED. He definitely has my blood and I'm immensely proud both boys have been so engaged in the general election - result aside, of course! I've spent their entire life instilling into them the importance of NOT having an 'I'm alright Jack' attitude. Sadly it appears we are in the minority but as far as we are concerned that is fine by us.

Lucas has decided he wants to help out in the next election campaign. Lucas-George - PM in the making!


This weekend I had an epiphany! Well actually it was more of an endorsement. An endorsement of my parenting skills. Although Wes' team narrowly missed out on a win, I was incredibly proud of his performance. It was a 'Rocky' moment. You know the one - young pretender gives his absolute all to try and inspire a win against the odds. He left absolutely nothing in the tank and was deservedly praised for it. Whilst his performance was admirable, it was his attitude that I was, and am, most proud of. He is one of the youngest in the group yet has the maturity to listen to advice and the confidence to speak out, in what could be a very intimidating environment. Most of all, I love his honesty. He owns his mistakes, learns from them and moves on. Lots of adults could certainly learn from his integrity.

Words cannot truly express my pride in both of them and in myself because in spite of people telling me I was wrong in bringing the boys up the way I have, I was right in sticking to my guns and not compromising my own beliefs. Children need to be respected, nurtured and helped along into adulthood.


Menieres


So, medication is supposed to make you feel better, right? WRONG! Since agreeing to try medication, I have felt so much worse. Some days I have been so bad that I have not been able to string a sentence together or even had enough energy to get dressed. It has been ridiculously hard to keep focus and keep going but I have,just. One thing I have learned this time is not to give myself such a hard time and expect to be able to go at 100 mph when my body can only manage 20 mph. I am going to try no medication this week and see how I feel by Friday.


The hardest part of Menieres is how much it knocks my confidence. Some days the floor moves like a ship and I am unsteady on my feet. Other days I can't hear what people are saying to me or even worse, I can honestly say I can't hear what is coming out of my mouth. It truly is a horrendous illness to cope with. Getting people to understand invisible illnesses is the biggest challenge in life.


Beyond the Past





Have you had the chance to read it yet? Would you like to review it for me?

Read the first three chapters FREE on my website






Available from:

Pegasus Publishers
Amazon UK
Kindle
Amazon US

Or you can order from your local bookshop. The ISBN number is : 978-1-84386-789-0 


Beyond the Lies


So I've decided to re-write it. I love my debut novel but it is just that. My first book. Like my boys, I like to learn from experiences and I have grown as a writer in such a short space of time. Instinctively I was not 100% happy with the first draft. It was only a DRAFT. Now the work begins again and I love what I have written so far. I will definitely be investing in a an editor - you live and learn.

Well, I am glad you are still with me. You have no idea how much your support means to me. I hope you have a wonderful week. This week we are in Sheffield four times but it is SOOO worth it.

Have fun...








Tuesday, 5 May 2015

May the force... be with us all



Last week was the first week I have not blogged since I started this blog. Every time I sat down to write the blog, something happened and I was called away to do something else. It is frustrating but you know, that’s life. I get to the end of the week and have no idea where my time has gone! Yet, I know exactly where it goes – divided between school runs, making fresh meals, running back and forth to Sheffield, attending rugby league and football matches and somewhere in between working on a PhD proposal and writing books and screenplays. I need to stop beating myself up and accepting I am not super human!!
Two weekends ago, I travelled to Gloucester to watch the Hallam Eagles win by 54 10, playing some outstanding rugby league and scoring some great tries. On the Sunday we
were up early to attend the Knaresborough Celtic football gala with Lucas. I have to say it was probably the best run gala I have ever been to. I know how exhausting they are to organise, but the weather was kind, which is always a bonus in the UK.

If hard work alone paid off, I’d be a blooming millionaire, still there are more important things in life than money.

In between the two matches and travelling, I write and edit. That is how I manage to get my work done and the 5am starts! In fact, the busier I am the more I get done. Do you find that too?

Menieres


Just after Christmas, I was referred to a Specialist because my symptoms were worsening and the periods of incapacity were getting longer. As usual by the time I got to see the Specialist the symptoms had subsided. I have never met such an arrogant man in all my life and trust me I have met a few over the years! He didn’t listen, he wasn’t remotely interested and decided it was not Menieres and I had migraine!! His diagnosis sent me in a spin (sorry, couldn’t resist it!).

Bearing in mind I lost my job because of Menieres and have spent seven years depriving myself of certain foods and drink, I was totally floored at first then angry. I had thousands of questions but went through a period of thinking I must have imagined all the pain and suffering. Anyway, I went to see my GP and he apologised profusely and referred me to another Specialist. After extensive tests, and not just one quick test like the first Specialist, it has been confirmed that I have bilateral Menieres and after seven years of resisting, I now have medication and am going for tinnitus therapy – the name conjures up all sorts of witty comments! I am so glad of our NHS and the brilliant doctors. There’s always ONE!

Tour De Yorkshire



This weekend the Tour De Yorkshire passed through, right by our house. I was SO excited. For about twenty years the Tour De France has been on my bucket list and I was so excited when we had the Grand Depart last year. The only trouble was I was in Cumbria for the rugby league when it happened. Sod’s bloody law!! Anyway I got to witness the Tour De Yorkshire this weekend and it was fabulous.
Lucas was a little taken aback at the speed of the riders but he was super happy when we managed to get a photograph of Sir Bradley Wiggins – Lucas has kept his sideburns since 2012 in homage of Sir Bradley!











PhD


This is such an important development for me and I received great feedback for the first draft proposal. Now I am working on the amendments. The funding, however, could take some time! Story of my life!

Writing


I have decided the best time to write for me is at 5am! The first two hours before the chaos of school commences is definitely the most productive. The clear skies and sunshine has been a boost too (although where has it gone?)

I have lots of projects on the go at the moment and in next week’s blog I am going to give you little teasers… I know I’m good that way!

Beyond the Past


Have you had the chance to read it yet? Would you like to review it for me?

Read the first three chapters FREE on my website






Available from:

Pegasus Publishers
Amazon UK
Kindle
Amazon US

Or you can order from your local bookshop. The ISBN number is : 978-1-84386-789-0

Election 2015


As the UK election is two days away I can’t go without adding my two penneth worth. People constantly chastise me for talking about politics and how I feel about my own country. Why shouldn’t we talk about it? That is so English! Or in my world … ye olde English! I want to debate issues. Too many people sit and moan yet do nothing. For me, not voting is a SIN, a criminal act. As far as I am concerned there is a clear choice – have a government that ensures the few succeed or one that encourages working people from all backgrounds to succeed and support those who are unfortunate enough to have lost their livelihood for whatever reason. I am super proud of our National Health Service and people seem to forget that it is in the forefront of research and development in the world in so many areas of health. 

I know who I am and what I believe in. Sneer, look down on me, call it ‘class envy’ or what you like. I am proud to fight for those less fortunate and still try to better myself. I believe that the problems with ‘benefits’, ‘tax avoidance’, ‘bank bonuses’, ‘look after number one philosophy’ all stem from Thatcher’s idiotic policies of the 1980s. Cameron is just finishing what she started – when few benefit at the cost of the many, it is not a democracy!!! Why should the individual business leaders cream off millions when their staff are interns, working for nothing or on zero hour contracts? You can still succeed with an ethical outlook. So shame on you all! The government is there to protect and serve ALL - it certainly does not feel that way!

It is time we talked about POLITICS – it’s time we teach our children the values of the NHS, education and a society that has the common decency to look after EVERYONE not the privileged few. 

Food banks in a modern society are scandalous especially for WORKING families. It’s real, it’s happening in my beloved country whilst MPs spend obscene amounts of money on CHAMPAGNE. Why is that right? The right wing press are despicable and Sky News has been switched off in our house otherwise I find myself shouting at the television.
Anyway, I’m off my soap box now.

May the 4th saw Lucas start to watch the Complete Saga for the first time. I was so excited as it is my favourite collection of films EVER. When they finally released the story behind Darth Vader, I booked tickets for Wes and I. In great anticipation, we sat there. At the moment which ALL was revealed, Wes was desperate for the toilet – yep, I missed it!!! So glad it came out on DVD.

Well, that’s me and if you are still reading, thank you… you are a superstar. May the force be with you…


Have a great week everyone