Thursday, 1 December 2016

Aint Life Frustratingly Brilliant...

Life can be so frustrating at times. I know I’m on the cusp of breaking through in my new career BUT I’m penniless and broke at Christmas time again! Thankfully I have children who do not put pressure on me for the latest gadgets and designer clothes. In fact, Lucas told me he doesn’t want much for Christmas this year because he realises he has much more than most children will ever get. Bless him. My heart bursts of pride. He has a true socialist heart!

He came out with me last Saturday on the national NHS campaign day. He absolutely loved it. It was a real moment for me… we chatted, laughed and spent some quality time together. He read the NHS leaflet from top to bottom and shook his head disapprovingly when I explained what the Government cuts had done. I love this little man to bits!


You may recall I told you I had submitted the script to the market. I received feedback this week and I could not be happier. It is so hard breaking into a new career especially when you have no one close to bounce ideas or peer review your work. This is an extract of the review:

I can’t put the second part in because it gives the plot away but I can say the constructive criticism has led to the script being edited. It is much stronger with just a few pointers from experts in the industry. I thank them so much for taking the time to read my work.

Now, it is ready to go off again but this time, on the recommendation of the review, I am sticking to my original plan of this being a television script. Wish me luck!

As a result of the positive feedback, I have decided to look into Arts Council funding too. 2017 is proving to be a very exciting year


What have I gotten myself into? Seriously, the workload is WOW! Just WOW! BUT… I do love writing in different formats but wasn’t sure I could still write technical content as well as fiction. After a review this morning, I really need to stop doubting myself. Old habits die hard! That’s what you get from years of people not having faith in you. How wrong they were! I need to stop listening to the doubters who know nothing and start trusting my instincts. Story of my life!

One thing is for sure… this woman is NOT giving up. When you’re desperate for money to live, it clouds your perspective. I need to keep telling myself the pain now will be worth the future. It’s not easy but nothing worth having is easy.  A new career is not built over night – it took twenty years to build my Insurance Broking career. I started my new writing career in 2011. Look how far I have come?

Whatever life throws up, you can overcome it. I know I have 100% backing from my gorgeous boys and Lucas telling me how proud he is of me, spurs me on to fight for my success.

It’s been an amazing week… frustrating but amazing. I now have a grants application, four Masters papers, a script submission and my writing to do within the next eight weeks. You know what? I wouldn’t have it any other way. Well…maybe some money coming in…

It’s the start of advent… we don’t have a mad Christmas. One room is decorated...the others will be done over the next few days... in between everything else that's happening.

We have a chilled, anything goes Christmas Day… we may have a barbecue in the rain or a Masterchef pasta making competition. Who knows? But whatever we do, we’ll have fun.

Much love

Sunday, 20 November 2016

Silence is NOT always golden

Who you surround yourself with, absolutely affects your own attitude, beliefs and actions in life. Choose carefully. Be brave and bold enough to stand up to those who deflate, attack and behave inappropriately towards you and make sure you tell them their behavior is NOT okay. I can assure you, it’s a boost to your self-esteem and helps others by exposing narcissists and unacceptable behaviour. You never know it may educate the perpertrators – we can live in hope!

Silence is not always the answer. Now more than ever, we need to start standing up to unacceptable behaviour and language. The recent xenophobia, stirred up by PUBLIC SERVANTS, wouldn't get much further than vile language if all those who are totally against, spoke up. Yes, they will try to shout you down, insult you, call you names but we need to stand up to them. STOP THIS NOW! The similarities between now and the 1930s is shocking and very, very scary. The hypocrisy of the ones calling for nationalism are the same ones fixated with wearing poppies. Do they understand the history? I very much doubt it! Please don't be fooled by these people. This anti- establishment elite are playing on fears of people yet indulging in the very system they are purporting to oppose! 

We need to be fighting for education in our schools to include constitutional studies, economics and social studies as compulsory subjects. We need to give our children the tools to hold public servants to account. They need to be engaged early on and I'm not talking about indoctrination, I'm talking about awareness of the system and governance. Governments love ignorance – they can't be held to account! Voter engagement is not just putting a cross on the paper at election time. Ask your MPs, Councillors questions. The only way the system will ever benefit the majority is if we fight to change the system.  We all know now not all elected people are in the position to represent the best interests of the people who put them there. So, what are you going to do about it? Leave it for someone else to tackle? Or, hold them to account? USE YOUR POWER – you are more powerful than you think.

I have no interest in being elected or working within a system I think is broken BUT I won't sit on the sidelines. I will use my education and research to help change things. Besides, can you imagine the stress effect on my Meniere's and the sensory overload! I'm sticking to the path I've chosen. Which path will you take?


Have you had the chance to read it yet? Would you like to review it for me?

Read the first three chapters FREE on my website
Available from:
Pegasus Publishers
Amazon UK
Amazon US
Or you can order from your local bookshop. The ISBN number is : 978-1-84386-789-0 

Okay back to the day job. In between studying for my Master's degree, I am still writing. Yesterday, I woke up with a clear idea of the ending of Beyond the Lies. It's taken a few months… well, I had an ending driving home from University but, by the time I got home to write it down, I'd forgotten it! Brain Fog or old age…I can't decide which was to blame.

Anyway, Saturday… I got this brilliant idea of an ending, dived out of bed and managed to write it all down before I became distracted. It's exhausting being me!!

The Nanny

I am still working on the Nanny. I have to confess it has taken a bit of a back seat until I finish Beyond the Lies but sometimes a break from a project allows you to review and change it. The direction of this work has definitely changed... for the better.


I'm about to send out my second batch of marketing. I desperately need some money coming in. We are living on borrowed time and I don't want to have to give up writing now when I've worked so hard to reinvent my career after losing it to Meniere's. My writing style has improved so much and I have learned how to screen write and so much more. It would be a shame to have to ditch it now.

I am not the person I was twelve months ago when I was at rock bottom and lost. I've made some major changes and I am so glad I have. I am proud of myself for standing up for my beliefs and not giving in.  I am even more proud of the boys - being so patient, understanding and supporting me. At my lowest point, I could not see a way out. You never think you will get sick and lose your job but it happens. Even when I thought I could not go on, I kept going and step by step I am repairing and rebuilding my shattered life

Robbie Williams' new song "I love my life" means so much to me. Sure, my life is not perfect and we are not out of financial danger yet but if you don't ask the answer will always be 'no' AND you'll always wonder 'what if'!

I won't let the Tories, bigots, liars, narcissists or Meniere's win!

Have a great, safe, happy and hate free week.

Much love

Wednesday, 16 November 2016

Truth Deniers

I make no apologies for this post...

I missed the memo, you know the one that said, "it's now normal practice and perfectly acceptable to lie through your teeth and attack people because they are not white males." You know that memo that gave a green light for politicians to use racist, misogynistic and defamatory language. Did you miss it too? Or are you one of the ones who are putting it into practice? If you're the latter… LEAVE NOW.

We have become a world of truth deniers:

  • Judges vilified and belittled for applying the law i.e. DOING THEIR JOB.
  • Academics, who have spent years working under strict ethical rules, being ridiculed because it doesn't fit the right wing agenda – vilified by people who don't even understand ethics!
  • Doctors and Consultants overruled by unqualified pen pushers in the Department of Work and Pensions.
  • Orgreave and child sex exploitation cases.

The examples are rising by the day. 

RACISM is UNACCEPTABLE and should be a red line for all of us. END OF! There is no excuse for it at all. I am sick of people accepting this disgraceful cancer on our society – THERE IS NO EXCUSE! It is the usual case of the right wing manipulating society to demonise a section of society so that people turn their frustration on them rather than the real perpertrators i.e. the political elite and irresponsible business owners like Green and Ashley.

Thatcher started this in the 1980s. Her strategy was to demolish the opposition and demonise workers who just wanted to work to provide for their families. It was politically motivated to eradicate ALL opposition. Let's face it – it worked because Labour became so ineffective until they turned into New Labour and turned their backs on the very people who Thatcher demonised!

The Tories introduced the ideology of "austerity" and blamed Labour and the immigrants for all that is evil in this country. They denied the truth of deregulation of the banks by Thatcher and greedy bankers causing the financial crisis. ANOTHER BIG FAT LIE. However, I really believe some Labour MPs believed the lies and I still feel some of them feel they have to emulate the Tories to win power, the very essence of why UKIP arrived and Labour lost votes!!

Austerity IS a political choice. The whole Government philosophy has been built on:
1.    Lies, lies and more lies
2.    Playing the blame game – "blame the unions"; "blame Labour"; "Blame immigrants"
3.    Suppress the truth coming out at all costs – spending figures; Labour's new policies; Orgreave; the Child Sex rings. What happened to the transparency we were promised? Oh yes… they lied about that too.

Let's be honest, Capitalism relies on the trickle-down effect NOT offshore hoarding by greedy, unethical corporate criminals.

The lack of housing, school places and jobs is down to the incompetence and failure of past and present Governments. It is not down to an EU citizen moving miles away from home just to feed their children. If you want to see real change, blame the real culprits:

  1. Successive Governments who have not looked after the interests of the people     
  2. Corporations and companies who have exploited workers, flouted laws and evaded tax.

And to those who have tried to silence me… IT WON'T WORK. I will not stay silent while my EU and international friends are blamed because you didn't bother to vote or failed to hold the Government to account. I won't allow my Government to make me out to be complicit in racism or prejudice. I value the opinions of professionals who have worked to gain their qualifications – more than I value the rhetoric and opinion of unqualified MPs that have not spent one day of their life without food or a roof over their head. I include the self-serving narcissist, Nigel Farage in that too! My gut feeling on Trump is he has been played by the ring wing of the Republican party - they needed a front man!

Let me just add this... you can NOT be a socialist and be racist!!!

I won't be a truth denier and I won't allow lies to be peddled in my name as a UK citizen. I am a proud citizen of the world and more importantly, your fellow human being. 

Much love