Monday, 29 May 2017

Meniere’s… the Teacher

Meniere’s has taught me so much and completely transformed my life… for the good, the bad and the downright ugly.

It lured me into a false sense of security, made me believe in some miracle cure... then wham… it struck! It’s like a volcano – lays dormant until it chooses to waken… then strikes with ferocity and anger, the eruption coming anytime, anywhere and usually when you least expect it or want it!

A month on from my recent drop attack, I still feel like crap. It’s, once again, stripped me of all my self-confidence and if I didn’t force myself to leave the house, I would become a total recluse – not a bad idea when it’s not forced upon you!

I ventured into University for a meeting with my Master’s supervisors. The feeling of the sun on my face was amazing but the speckles glistening on the floor of the food hall made me feel I was back on that ship in a force ten gale. It’s horrifying to feel the rug being pulled from under you! The meeting was good apart from sitting there trying to hide the swaying and sickness feeling whilst speaking coherently.

No matter how much Meniere’s thinks it is winning, life must still go on. I have caught up on my Masters works mainly by typing with my eyes shut and working at 3am when I could not sleep. I’ve done it… all five of them and three presentations. Are they perfect? NO! One, in particular, is well below par. Realistically, I’ve downgraded my target of distinctions across the board to a merit overall. A pass is a pass – sometimes only a compromise will work! It’s not okay as I wanted to hit my target but what can I say? I’m a fighter!

I now have three months to work on my final dissertation and thankfully, I have some of the work already done. I feel I’ve overcome the hardest part of the Masters – it is not the reading, research or writing – the hardest challenge was being able to meet the very tight deadlines! Again, I have found limitations in my capabilities - live and learn!

For the last three days, I’ve had an eye infection – a by-product of the fluid I think. I’ve finally, after a thirteen-year fight, been given a date for a CT scan. We can finally see what is going on in my head – I pity the doctor who should see that!!


My Masters dissertation covers a subject close to my heart – computer science in schools. I think our children are being short changed by our education system particularly in secondary schools. I would like to develop this further in a PhD which will start in 2018. Between now and then, after my MSc IT, I am going to doing a PGCE – teaching course in Computer Science. I have my interview on election day! Wish me luck!


I am still writing… well…typing…with my eyes shut. All I can say is thank goodness for grammar and spell check. Some of the spellings are very funny indeed.  I have looked at voice recognition software which I may invest in later.

My latest project is to find a literary agent. It’s blooming tough. Believe me, writing 100,000+ words are the easy part!


How can we solve the problems if we can’t have a grown-up debate about them? However uncomfortable the subject, in a democracy, we must be able to discuss issues openly. Terrorism IS a by-product of disputes and wars. That fact does not detract from the evil of perpetrators or the suffering of the victims. It means we can start to look at ALL these issues and look at how best we stop atrocities from happening.

In protecting its citizens, the Government should look at ALL aspects of evil including turning the spotlight on themselves. The nasty Tory rhetoric of xenophobia fuels hatred and must stop as well as their collusion with States who fund terrorism. Someone is paying for the equipment, the training – who? Why? How? It is common sense and Jeremy Corbyn is absolutely right but then he has been on the right side of wrong decisions over the last 30 years. He has earned his right to be listened to and is a true principled statesman. Everyone deserves peace!

Last Tuesday in Manchester was horrific and I find it hard to put into words how sickening it was. My heart felt love goes out to everyone affected. This includes our amazing emergency teams – doctors, nurses, paramedics, police, armed forces, firemen. We all take them for granted. People don’t join our emergency services for the money (what money??). They join because they possess one of our true British values – they want to help other people. They deserve, not just our respect but our backing and they deserve to be given the tools for them to do their jobs effectively. Please vote Labour on the 8th June and give our amazing emergency services what they need and truly deserve.

Life is so precious! Celebrate it! Live it!

Much love

Sunday, 14 May 2017

PEOPLE! Use your VOTE… it is your voice!

Time to pin your colours to the mast… for me… it is RED all the way for me!!

Anyone who knows me, knows I love inspirational quotes and signs – not signs as in cosmic revelations (you know what I mean!) but placards around our home giving inspiration to the boys and me.

This one I saw this week for a bargain price of 90p. It really captures the mood of the General Election, don’t you think?

We have an obvious choice – continue with the status quo where only 1% of the population have the rewards on the back of the hard work of the 99% or we choose a peacekeeping statesman who wants to stand up for all of us. For so many years people have told me ‘they’re all the same’ and ‘why vote…nothing changes’.

PEOPLE! If voting did not make a difference – they would have given it freely without a fight!

PEOPLE!! The world does NOT have to be this way – we don’t have to:

  • Fight wars

  • Have children in poverty in 2017!

  • Have ill people dying from inhumane sanctions

  • Have schools where parents pay for essential equipment

  • Have women prove they were raped

  • Have essential services – fire, police and NHS on their knees

  • Have infrastructure not fit for purpose

  • Have corporations exploiting workers and avoiding paying tax! We can’t, why should they?

AND we certainly do NOT need the return of barbaric fox hunting!!

This week’s cyber-attack has been a bit of a “I told you so” moment. I have been banging on about the real risk of cyber terrorism and it has fallen on deaf ears. The fact that Trident is controlled by computers and so are our national grid and water services, should make everyone very nervous indeed!

Labour all the way

I am immensely proud of the Labour manifesto. Every announcement this week has given me goose bumps. There is real hope for the future. Progressive policies, sensible costings, peace and prosperity for all but do you know what I love the most? IT’S COMPASSION.

Tackling loneliness, homelessness, job insecurity, providing lifelong learning – my struggle after losing my job through Meniere’s would have been much easier!!

Patriotism is not waving a flag, attacking people from different countries or cultures or singing a national anthem. Patriotism is paying your taxes, treating every citizen with dignity and providing an environment where everyone can make their contribution.

Meniere’s is preventing me from canvassing this time but I’ll do everything I can to give my children and everyone hope for their futures – Jeremy has handed hope to all of us. Grab it with both hands. Really…what do you have to lose?

IT’S NOW OVER TO US. We do have incredible power in our hands… if we use it wisely.

Steps to change our country:
  1. Register to vote here - deadline 22 May 2017.
  2. Read what is on offer – don’t rely on the media – don’t let them lie or hoodwink you!
Do NOT lose your voice and if you don’t vote… don’t moan!
Jeremy Corbyn’s Labour is giving this country hope. If Brexit was taking back control… this Labour manifesto takes it back and hands it to each one of us. How exciting is that?

Choose wisely my friends

Why can’t people be nice?

Why do people want to play me? I just don’t get it. Yesterday, a girl who has totally ignored me and written some inaccurate stuff about me, based on someone else’s lies, wanted to befriend me. I am guarded due to past experiences especially when she’s already said she doesn’t want to get to know me. Being a budding MI5 agent (I wish!!). I did some digging. To be fair it was not that hard. People who play games tend to give themselves away on social media. I may be naively trusting but I am not stupid. Research is a wonderful gift.

Meniere’s has taught me life is way too short to put up with silly girls and silly games.

The world is a tough place and there are so many issues we can concentrate our efforts on. Small minded people play games – caring and trusting people make the world a much better place for EVERYONE!

It is always acceptable for you to say NO to being treated badly! Remember that! I wish I had learned that years ago. You don’t have to suffer to be polite! Stuff that. If they can’t treat you well, don’t have them in your lives! You deserve to be treated so much better than that.

It’s my birthday soon and the boys have bought me an early birthday present. I’m not sure Theresa May will approve!! It’s great isn’t it!

Right, I’m off to do the ironing. This afternoon we are at a children’s birthday party…well Lucas is. I may have to try and find a TV screen for the Liverpool game or F1. Have a lovely day and week.

Much Love

Wednesday, 10 May 2017

Meniere’s Madness

I’m all over the place at the minute. When I was diagnosed with Meniere’s Disease, the Consultant did tell me it was very early days and it would become progressively worse. That was fourteen years ago. There have been good and bad periods and recently, up to last week, I went through a great spell. I thought, by some miracle, I had been cured! Then last Sunday knocked me for six when I had a sudden drop attack. No warning, just bang! Totally out of the blue whilst out canvassing for the election.

My confidence is at an all-time low again. I am scared to go out and have to force myself to do everyday things like shopping, schools run because I have to. I have no choice. I have help from Wes and Lucas and that is it. You see – people just don’t understand and I have not got the patience to sit and explain it repeatedly in the hope that the penny will finally drop.

I am desperately trying to get well as I can’t afford to be ill both financially and physically. I have so much to do. For now, I have had to slow down which is impacting on my Master’s degree and my future plans. The bright side is the doctors have finally conceded to run further tests and do a CT scan. I may even get the chance to change from the awful Consultant I have. Every cloud has a silver lining!! For now, I have to sit back and let the world pass me by. Today I feel like I’m on a ship in a rough storm, tomorrow it could be a gentle sway. Who knows?

The frustration of not being able to campaign in this election, complete my Masters assignments and spend time in the sun with my boys is overwhelming at times. I hate it! Don’t ever take your health for granted or spend time on insignificant, trivial matters. Live life to the full – everyday!

I’m typing most of this with my eyes shut and occasionally open them to see red and blue lines across the page! Need more practice but wish I didn’t have to.

The writing is on hold this week too
It's SATs week for Lucas. I am have been so impressed with him and the school who have gone out of their way to ensure no pressure has been placed on the children. They even sent a small survival pack out to all the children - very clever :

I am so proud of Jeremy Corbyn and the Labour Party. It is one of the hardest challenges in
life to stick your head above everyone else and stay true to your principles. Now, those principles of fairness and equality we share, are being debated and called out. It is refreshing to have people on my side for once.

Source UK Labour
Things cannot go on the way they are but I fear people will not see the potential in Labour’s policies and vote for a woman who has consistently lied throughout her time in Cameron’s Government and as Prime Minister. As a proud, intelligent Yorkshire lass, I find it deeply insulting the Conservatives think by replacing their name with “Theresa’s Team” us up north will be hoodwinked into supporting her. A sheep in wolf’s clothing!

Going forward, the Labour Party and the trade unions need to establish a policy and research centre to focus on future educational and job requirements, preferably set up in Leeds (hint! hint!).

Much love