Sunday, 10 September 2017

Me vs Meniere’s

Well I thought I had done well the last couple of months with virtually no symptoms other than the persistent tinnitus. Until I visited the White Rose shopping centre that is! Honestly, why they must put speckles or patterns into the flooring is beyond me.

Wes and I went yesterday afternoon to buy a very special gift for an incredibly special man in my life. I was not too worried as I had been so well and life is great now with lots of exciting things to look forward to and hope for our futures.

Within five minutes of being in the centre, my body temperature began to rise. The noise, the lights, the flashes, the patterns on the floor, the people bumping into me, the quick movements to get out of their way all started to become too much. The panic starts to set in. Can I stay on my feet? Can people see me panicking? Am I making a fool of myself? How embarrassing would it be to fall in front of all these people. Would they think I was drunk in the afternoon!!!

I tried to stay calm and focus on why we were there. We stopped for some lunch and relaxed, sitting outside in the sunshine. It was some much-needed son and Mum time as shortly our lives are going to change beyond recognition… for the better! Thankfully, my boys are totally understanding and I usually avoid situations I know are triggers but sometimes life means you can’t avoid them, you have to hit them head on.

We had to go back and collect the gift after lunch. What a relief when I stepped outside knowing I had not succumb to the horrors of Meniere’s. I did, however, need to go home and sleep. The experience had worn me out but I am here to fight another day with my dignity intact… just! I win again!

Most days, I live with this monster, dormant inside me. Even on bad days, I work and keep going but there are some days when it wakes up and just reminds me it is still there!!!
Enjoy your week and stay safe
Much Love

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